“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”—Ezekiel 36:26
Yesterday was the 29th anniversary of my first husband, John’s death. In a matter of seconds, my world was turned upside down. A future was ripped away from me. The life I had looked forward to was no longer going to be occurring.
I went from being happily married, with a moving truck scheduled to move us into a recently purchased/remodeled house in a new town to booking a U-Haul for my son and I to move into my parents’ home. Not quite the life I had anticipated.
God gave me a new heart to not be bitter from my circumstances. What broke my heart is what made my heart. It softened it to enable me to minister to broken people in a different way….in the name of Jesus.
Remembering this time in my life can bring tears, but the truth is it also reminds me of God’s steadfast love. He never gave up on me in my wandering days when I wasn’t aware that He was missing from my life. There is power in remembering where I was and how far God has brought me and is still bringing me.
How it must have grieved God’s heart that I was living a life without Him in it. Thankfully, when we turn back to God, He always welcomes us back home.
When John died, I couldn’t imagine a life for me and my children without him in it. However, once I started living a life with Jesus in it, it made that reality more bearable. Yes, I still grieved his death, but I also had a reason to find joy. I saw all the love, kindness and compassion that Jesus provided for me from family, friends and strangers.
My identity went from being a wife and mother to a daughter of the King. Since God’s spirit lives in me, He has been able to use me for nearly 3 decades to comfort others in their grief. Because of what I have been through as well as what I am going through with my mother, I am able to offer hope and comfort to others.
From high school until my late 20’s I wandered in the ways of the world. It took the tragedy of my first husband’s death 29 years ago to be brought back to the heart of God. When we encounter the risen Savior through salvation, it changes our heart, body and soul.
Father God,
Thank You for giving me a new heart and spirit. You have been able to use my heartaches and hurts to show others how You care so deeply for each of Your children. Thank You for Your tender care in every day of my life. I cling to Your promise that You never leave me or forsake me. I lift those up to You who are searching to fill a hole in their heart that only You can mend. Lead them to brothers and sisters in Christ who can share their testimony of how Jesus changes lives. I pray these things in the name of Jesus. Amen.
June Verse
“The LORD is near to all who call on Him, To all who call on Him in truth.”—Psalm 145:18 (NASB)
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