“For he has rescued us from the kingdom of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of his dear Son, 14 who purchased our freedom and forgave our sins.”—Colossians 1:13-14 (NLT)
This time of the year, I write a similar blog post. It’s so I never forget where I was and where I am today. It is a powerful reminder of God’s steadfast love for me in 1995 and now.
On this day thirty years ago, as I stood on that beach in Cabo San Lucas Mexico, watching my first husband’s body bobbing up in down in the swells of the ocean, I couldn’t even imagine what blessings could come from such a tragedy.
While I was raised in the church, I didn’t truly know who Jesus was. I was living in darkness and didn’t even realize it. I had no idea what living in the light even meant. It took my first husband, John’s death for me to seek out who this Jesus was that I had been hearing about over the years from friends and family who truly cared about my salvation.
Once I accepted Jesus Christ into my heart, it brought a new way of life for me. I was living in the light of His Love. It didn’t mean I wouldn’t grieve or not be sad over John’s death. I did grieve and I was sad. However, I no longer felt helpless and hopeless.
Finding Jesus is what gave me a supernatural comfort that can’t be described. Was I still sad? Yes. He was the only explanation for how I could get out of bed and function each day. He gave me the strength I didn’t have in me. I felt His presence and loving arms embracing me during those dark days. It is what brought me light and hope in that deep anguish.
You know, it is okay to not be okay. God created us to experience grief. If we don’t, we can’t find the fullness of God’s love for us. His Word is true. He does give us strength when we are weak. Feeling my grief is the only way I can receive divine comfort from my loving Father.
It is also possible to have the joy of Jesus even in the most difficult circumstances. I can tell you from my own personal experience that the joy of Jesus in our hearts can coexist. The light of Jesus shines on us even in our dark days. When we tap into life giving goodness, our eyes are open to the little ways He provides.
We grow stronger in our hardships. They can be beneficial to our spiritual growth. Looking back, I can see how I was held up by the hand of God guiding me and giving me strength. He still does. We are never alone in our struggles.
Through our trials we receive abundant blessings. Knowing I had a Savior who comforted me was one of them. He also revealed to me that I didn’t need a degree in theology to start a ministry. We are all called to minister in some way. It isn’t reserved for pastors or those who have a theology degree.
While I am not glad about being widowed at such a young age, I am thankful for God’s provisions as well as how He used it to prune some dead areas in my life. The pruning helped prepare me for what I am doing now. Change happened in me. Now, through me God has and is able to use me.
If you are in a dark season, Jesus is with you holding your hand. In the book of Job, he lost everything, but God never left him. He never leaves us either. He is our everlasting rock that will NEVER abandon us.
We are citizens of His kingdom who are walking in His light. My past experiences gave me a heart to minister to others who may not know Jesus. God’s light shines the brightest through us when we show others the same sacrificial kindness Jesus gives us.
Father God,
Thank You for being my unfailing Comforter. When I follow You, I will not walk in darkness. You are my Light. Only You can use life’s struggles to know You better. Lead me to proclaim the Good News of Jesus to those living in darkness. I lift those up to You who are feel lost and hopeless. May they feel the warmth of Your Light shining on them. I pray these things in the might name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
June Verse
“Let everything that breathes sing praises to the LORD! Praise the LORD!”Psalm 150:6 (NLT)
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